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Sunday, April 6, 2014

Hey Ray...What Would Ozzie Do?

 Newly appointed GM Ray Farmer has been given the keys to the jalopy known as the Cleveland Browns. He can jumpstart the franchise by getting the first three rounds of this year's NFL draft right. These five picks will determine whether the team turns First Energy Field into Pandemonium Palace or Pee Wee's Playhouse. Farmer has an opportunity to make Browns fans forget about how Hall of Fame tight-end and Ravens team president Ozzie Newsome, rode away on the Art Model buggy while under cover of darkness, to become the architect of numerous Super Bowl championships. Just in case Ray is a little busy canceling Pro-Days, scouting potential seventh round draft picks, or wallpapering his new office, I've offered up a few suggestions for the first three rounds that are sure to send Browns fans into a frenzy come draft day.

1a. Johnny Manziel / QB, Reasoning: No guts...No glory! The time is now to obtain a franchise quarterback in Cleveland and nobody in this draft can make the likes of Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, and Baltimore take notice that there's a new sheriff in town...And that gunslinger's name is "Johnny Football!"

1b. Xavier Su'a-Filo / G, Reasoning: Instant starter and ends the revolving door at guard for the next ten years. The big guy specializes in run blocking and with Manziel at quarterback and newly acquired running back Ben Tate in the backfield, Su'a-Filo will be the perfect escort service.

2. Allen Robinson / WR, Reasoning: Looking for this year's Keenan Allen? It's this guy! To obtain this first team All-American and the best receiver in the history of Penn State football in the second round is a steal. Robinson will give Manziel another toy to play with on offense and will divert attention from teams doubling up on star receiver Josh Gordon.

3a. Preston Brown / ILB, Reasoning: As much as I believe Karlos Dansby is an upgrade from D. Jackson, the team needs to get younger and stronger inside. Brown called the shots on defense for Louisville the past three years and at 6'1" - 250 lbs. is perfect for a new head coach with a defensive mentality.

3b. Stanley Jean-Baptiste / CB, Reasoning: Size does matter and at 6'2' the former "Cornhusker" gives the Browns and Joe Haden immediate help at the hot corner. They'll need it, as teams began picking on little Buster Skrine last year. Skrine moves over to cover the slot and Stanley begins the season as the starter. You might say "Baptiste by Fire!"        

Thursday, January 2, 2014

The Case for "Johnny Football"

Now that Tim Tebow is safely tucked away analyzing the SEC on ESPN, I can focus my attention on the next quarterback who I believe can save the Cleveland Browns from themselves...Texas A&M's Johnny Manziel. I'm tired of the same ole' same ole'! In the words of the great Chicago Bears linebacker Mike Singletary..."I want winners!" He captured the Heisman Trophy as a freshman and singlehandedly beat Duke University in the "Chic-Fil-A Bowl" in what very well may be his last game as an amateur. This kid has the ability to "WILL" his team to victory. I want someone at the helm who's going to get your attention in the huddle! He has the uncanny ability to make plays with his feet and his arm. He escapes pressure better than anyone in the upcoming draft, and can make all the throws regardless of what kind of offense you are operating. He works exclusively out of the shotgun and hands the ball off to his running back maybe 15 times a game. He will be your leading ground gainer and teams will have fits trying to contain him. I always said..."New coach ...New quarterback." I've seen it throughout the league time and time again. We are the only team that saddles it's new coach with an existing QB. If it's Josh McDaniels & Manziel then so be it! This team has five pro-bowlers on the roster. When was the last time we could say that? The time to win is NOW and the best shot we have at doing so is with this kid holding the keys to the caddy! In the words of Morgan Freeman to his jailhouse friend Andy..."You can get busy living or you can get busy dying!" I choose the former and Johnny Manziel will be the CPR we need to get this franchise off of life support and back in the game!

Monday, December 2, 2013

Dear Santa, Please Give Our Browns...

1. A quarterback that won't break when you wind him up and place him on the field.
2. A secondary that when you pull their string they just shut-up and play football.
3. A right tackle...Oh and maybe a right guard, Oh and maybe a left guard. Scratch that. How about a new set of blocks!
4. Sonic The Hedgehog action figure who will start at running back and keep his legs moving long after he hits the line of scrimmage.
5. A new "Mingo," I mean "Bingo" game!
6. An all expenses paid trip for wide-out Josh Gordon to Middlefield, where he will be able to hang out with the Amish this off season. Early to bed, early to rise!    
7. A franchise quarterback in this year's college draft. Call me greedy but maybe another QB later on in the draft...just in case! 
8. A new gift  shop in the stadium that will sell Browns jerseys with velcro letters and numbers. The perfect gift for that diehard fan.
9. A sharp looking lid for the stadium. "First Energy" would then become more energy efficient.
10. For  Browns fans everywhere.....The gift of HOPE. We seemed to have misplaced ours!     

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Why The Browns Need Tim Tebow

The Browns need Tim Tebow, (Insert laugh here). The trouble is...I'm not laughing and neither should you Browns fans. Last week our beloved Browns took the field in what was our home opener. Everyone I knew felt the team was going to walk away victoriously by beating the not so exciting Dolphins from Miami. We got trounced by an aggressive Dolphin "D" who made Browns quarterback Brandon Weedon long for the days when he could throw a 90 mile an hour fastball, and not have to worry about the batter trying to rip his head off. This kid just doesn't have what it takes to be a winner. After trying his luck with baseball and now football, there's always arm wrestling, hotdog eating, and the soapbox derby. At twenty-nine years of age, he may be too old for the derby. Thus enter the incredible Mr. Tebow. So Mr. Haslam, Mr. Banner, and Mr. Lombardi, here are my ten reasons for signing Timmy...

1. THIS TOWN NEEDS SOME EXCITEMENT! After years of listening to the slap happy Pat Shurmur and now Chud the dud and Banner's bantering, let's spice things up a bit. Tebow will bring the spotlight to Cleveland. It would be the story of the year..."Castoff quarterback leads team that the NFL forgot to the playoffs."  

2. Tebow has more to prove than Brandon Weedon and is almost four years younger.

3. Tebow has almost 1,000 yards rushing in just three seasons. Weedon can't escape pressure and doesn't even know when he's being pressured.

4. Tebow has won the Heisman Trophy, a college football national championship while with the Florida Gators, and beat the Steelers in the playoffs as a member of the Denver Broncos. He's a WINNER!

5. He's passed for 17 touchdowns and ran for 12 more. He's the quarterback you want in the game inside the five yard line.

6.  He averages 5 yards per carry running the football. Trent Richardson averages 3.6 YPC.

7. He's a lot harder to game plan for. Just ask Steeler's head coach Mike Tomlin.

8. He's been playing football since he was a baby,  (Read: Tebow - Through My Eyes). Brandon Weedon is a baseball player turned football player. We're not talking Bo Jackson here people!

9. Let's hear what Jet's receiver Jeremy Kerley has to say about Tim... "Different than Mark, different than Mark," Kerley said at the NFL Pop-Up store on 41st today. "(Tebow's) ball comes out a little bit stronger, but he's accurate, he's more accurate than what I thought he was going to be. But he's a good dude, he has a great personality, he'll bring a lot of personality to the team." All in all Kerley thought Tebow was a better quarterback than Mark Sanchez, and the Browns would love to have Mark Sanchez under center.

10. If Norv Turner is the quarterback guru that everyone says he is, than Tim Tebow could be his final masterpiece.  

                                                          IT'S TEBOW TIME!

Sunday, September 8, 2013

FF&B Smash...Crash...& Stash...Who To Start...Not Start...& Pick Up Before Anyone Else Does!

Smash QB. / Andrew Luck vs Raiders
* Everyone gets open in this one as Luck takes his game to the next level. 4 touchdowns!
Crash QB. / Geno Smith vs Bucs
* Like Tim Misney always says: "I'm gonna make'm pay!" Won't finish the game against an improved Buc's "D."
Stash QB. / Sam Bradford vs Cardinals
* Undrafted in a number of leagues, the light bulb finally goes on for "Sling'n Sammy!"  

Smash RB. / DeMarco Murray vs Giants
* He's not hurt anymore. 120 yards and a score.
Crash RB. / C.J. Spiller vs Patriots
* Not much on the ground, maybe 40 yards receiving.
Stash RB. / Giovani Bernard vs Bears
* Speedy back causes Bears nightmares. 80 yards receiving and a score.

Smash WR. / Julio Jones vs Saints
* Ryan goes up-top early and often to Jones who destroys the Saint's secondary.
Crash WR. / Danny Amendola vs Bills
* Slow start for Amendola along with the emergence of Kenbrell Thompkins.
Stash WR. / Kenbrell Thompkins vs Bills
* Undrafted free agent tore it up in pre-season and will continue to do so. 100 yards and a score.   

Friday, September 6, 2013

FFAB's NFL Predictions 2013 Season

Things have changed around the National Football League since I was a young boy. Computers, Cable TV, Twitter, and Tivo have changed the way we watch our favorite sports. For me it was "The Voice Of God," John Facenda who would run the highlight reel from the previous week's contests on Saturday mornings. Sure I could have been watching Mickey Mouse, Scooby Doo, or Looney Toons, but instead I chose to eat my Cheerios to Facenda's interpretations of what took place on, "The frozen tundra of Lambeau Field," or "Off the windy shores of Lake Erie." Afterwards my friends and I would head down to the park with our favorite pigskin and pretend we were Detroit's, tight-end, Charlie Sanders making a one handed touchdown grab towards the back of the endzone, or Viking's elusive quarterback Fran Tarkington escaping pressure and sliding for a first down, leaving the opposing team's defensive line winded and frustrated. But even as a kid, I had high hopes for the Cleveland Browns and would predict big things from them year to year. So after many disappointments and feeling winded and frustrated by my prognostications, I grew up and am more ready than ever to make my 1st Annual FFAB's NFL Predictions for the 2013 season.Sorry Brown's fans, the boys in brown & orange will remain in the cellar of the AFC North with a record of 7-9. Maybe next year..............

AFC East
Patriots 12-4
* They will get stronger as the year goes along and that's scary.

AFC North
Bengals 11-5
* Andy Dalton has more toys to play with this year.  

AFC South
Texans 11 -5
* They'll take no prisoners on defense.

AFC West
Broncos 13-3
* Manning will be the MVP of the league and the wild horses will run wild over the AFC.

Colts 11-5
* With a little "Luck" they could win that division.
Ravens 10-6
* Even after losing eight starters they back in to the playoffs.
Chiefs 10-6
* Andy Reid gets the most out of an under-achieving team.

NFC East
Cowboys 10-6
* Poised to take the division and the next step.

NFC North
Packers 12-4
* The Pack is Back and will take the wraps off of their new running game.

NFC South
Falcons 13-3
* Ryan, White, Jones, Gonzalez....& Steven Jackson? That's just not fair.

NFC West
Seahawks 11-5
* I believe in Russell Wilson...and of course that SUPERIOR defense.

49ers 11-5
* Something to prove this year.
Redskins 10-6
* Too much depending on ONE player...RG3.
Rams 10-6 
* Jeff Fisher trades punches with Carroll & Harbaugh.

AFC Champs: Denver Broncos
NFC Champs: Green Bay Packers
Super-Bowl Champs: Denver Broncos  


Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Browns Are A CUT Below!

Not that I wish to be an "Eddie Downer" on the eve of another Cleveland Brown's march towards the Lombardi Trophy but...
1. They are without a placekicker. Waste of six weeks of training camp having Bogatay and Graham battle for the starting spot vacated by Phil Dawson.
2. They picked up two running backs and two tight-ends off the junk pile. That means...They picked up four players nobody else wanted.
3. They need help at guard. And No...Oniel Cousins is not the answer.
4. They can't sustain an injury to any of the DB's especially Joe Haden or they're screwed.
5. They have a number one draft pick who's lungs are all bruised up, and may or may not play in a game until week number two.
6. They have their number one receiver Josh Gordon, sitting somewhere in the Dawg Pound for the first two games of the season because he used cough medicine.
7. They have a twenty-nine year old second year quarterback who is learning a whole new offensive system.
8. They are now playing a 3-4 defense as opposed to the 4-3 defense they played last year.
9. They brought in a new coaching staff this year.
10. They have an owner who may be indicted before the year is through, and his 83 year old father would take over the team should he end up spending time at the gray bar hotel.
Now...Are you ready for some football?